Being honest...

Caught one of my favourite lady on tv this morning so I decided to stay tuned. It turned out that the topic was on marriages. Why are there so many failed marriages nowadays? Is honesty the best policy at all time? How to tackle the presence of a third party? It's been a long time since I've seen her on tv so it's nice to be hearing her again. She's quite a low-key motivational speaker, and I like her. Good both in BM and English. There's just something about her voice la. Well, as to quote a friend, everyone can sing, but it's that certain voice that's prized. Same goes for everyone can motivate people I guess, it's just the way you present it that makes all the difference. Maksud yang sama tapi cara penyampaian berbeza kan banyak bezanya. Salah penyampaian maka wrong msg lah yang being conveyed.

Be frank, honest, love, care and share, put them in the marriage bowl. That's the secret. Everyone in the household is a leader. Yes, the husband is the leader but everyone is a leader inside, in you. You must have the sense of sharing responsibilities and be independent. Anyone must be able to open up to constructive criticism. Life and love is about sharing, trust and understanding.

That’s the thing too. The younger generations are much more 'educated' in comparison to our forefathers and yet the divorce statistics seemed that only sky is the limit. You know in a marriage you must do this, tolerate that, communicating ideas across etc etc, and yet, it still happens. True, mana ada marriage that doesn't rocks. Mana ada marriage yang doesn't go through hard times. Well, in regards with the high statistics, I like the comment laid by the other panel which is initially you were not in depth with the relationship. You have not been able to connect on the whole. It's all coated in sugary syrup during the courtship days.

Another statement mentioned that you cannot compare yrself to the mother. You just have to know you're second in place. He's been under his parents care for say, 25,26,27 years and he's only been with you not even a decade, so you have to understand and give in at times. Teringat pulak one incident whereby this aunty that I know can finally have the guts to say this to her husband, "Awak dah duduk dengan saya 40 tahun, awak duduk dengan mak awak 21 tahun, siapa yang patut awak lebihkan sekarang?" she can say that lah since it's been 40 years. Anyway, was not so paying attention so I didn't know what ignite that remark. Not gonna touch on submission and all but a wife's place does come second after his mother, kan...

Reality speaking is out of the 100% you're giving in a marriage, it'd be essential that at least 70% is patience. Tanpa kesabaran I think one can easily collapsed. Even under any circumstances pun, bawa banyak-banyak bersabar.

They were all also doing some sms polls, though we have no idea how many actually voted, 61% disagree to being honest at all time. 39% hold on to this best policy.

What else did they talked about... I can't remember. Then, on Oprah, she was also touching on the issue of honesty and infidelities. Basically watching all these that spark off the entry.

Well, like I told Kak Teh last night, am still very much a green pucuk ubi, so young and still have many more to look fwd in life. Tidak sesuai membicarakan topics like these.

It's like a mini construction site in here. The lingering smell of cements, paints, the drillings, and my parents kept calling checking on me and the workers. This morning we watched the re-run of Malcolm In The Middle together and had a good laugh (!). Basically, because they're doing the living room area this morning.

And I've not had anything yet... better make a move now.

Have a beautiful day you beautiful people.